I'm Not in Love: An Anti-Valentine's Day Soundtrack

While I consider myself to be a hopeless romantic, romance has never really been my thing. There's a difference, you know. Romantic is a state of mind; romance revolves around gestures.

I'm in love with love and the closeness that it brings. (Though I always reserve the right to sleep alone, I'm a diehard spooner/cuddler.) I get swept away with the best of them. But when you start lighting candles and drawing bubble baths, I'm so out of there. I'm like Miranda Hobbes that way.

As for sweet nothings, I'm still waiting for someone to put it in a love song. Until then, email or text will do. It's been nearly eight years since I received a handwritten love note. I hope I get another one someday, once again on a plain piece of white paper. That'd be enough for me. If I never get another Valentine or Hallmark card, I won't miss either. They're clutter, and then they're trash. So are flowers. Yeah, I'm a cheap love interest. My love really don't cost a thing.

So guess how I feel about Valentine's Day and its commercialization of romance. I'm not saying I'd turn down a big red heart if one were to fall out of the sky, but I'd be perfectly fine with rain. And should it come pouring down on V Day, I'll have the perfect soundtrack.

"I'm Not in Love" Will to Power…This version, not the 10cc original. I love them nearly equally, but when she starts singing about his picture on the wall, I just lose it. (And yes, I get the irony of the lyrics.)



"When You Get Right Down to It" Phyllis Hyman…A woman falling out of love.



"I Don't Need You" Kenny Rogers…So much more my speed than "Lady."



"Move a Mountain" Robert Cray…Is it just a coincidence that the blues are named after my favorite color?



"I Hate Myself for Loving You" Joan Jett and the Blackhearts…I love rock & roll, too, but I doubt Joan and the guys would have sneaked into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame without this bitter anthem in their back catalog.



"I Love to Hate You" Erasure…I've never actually hated anyone, and I don't think I could possibly love it if I did, but I totally get what he's singing.



"Never Had No One Ever" The Smiths…Ah, Morrissey, the kind of un-wishful thinking.




"I Want a Dog" Pet Shop Boys...Sorry, but the appeal of cats has always gone right over my head.



"Sweet Dreams My L.A. Ex" Rachel Stevens...Yeah, f**k off.




"Get Mine, Get Yours" Christina Aguilera...And sometimes, it's just about the sex.