Thursday, October 22, 2009

BURNING QUESTIONS: OCTOBER EDITION

"Praise will bind, confuse, and break the enemy and cause his hands to be still." -- Anonymous

Actually, I read this on the status update wall of my Facebook home page this morning (so it's not exactly anonymous). But what does it mean?

Speaking of Him, God bless Rihanna for changing the tempo and digging deeper and darker after one hellish year on her new single, "Russian Roulette." Plus her voice sounds better than ever. But what happened to the melody? And that gunshot at the end is pretty creepy. Will they have to edit it out on the radio? How will it fare against Chris Brown's equally strange new single, "I Can Transform Ya," already a Top 20 hit in week two on Billboard's Hot 100? (It reminds me a little of "Switch" by Ashanti Ft. Nelly.) I guess there is always room on the charts for domestic abusers. Final question: Rihanna, how can we miss you blind if you refuse to go away?

Surprise! Last night I went out with a guy who is nine days older than I am. It was nice to have an adult conversation with an adult. He shocked me when he told me that he has every single Barbra Streisand CD, including the new one. Although it wouldn't have been such a fun but strange fact had it been revealed in a coffee shop in the middle of Chelsea in New York City, it was the last thing I expected to hear come out of a porteƱo's mouth while sitting in a pizzeria in Palermo Hollywood. But why did he keep lapsing into Spanglish while I remained in Spanish-speaking character throughout? And when Stone Temple Pilots' "Interstate Love Song" came on (much to my delight), why did whoever controls the music in the pizza joint turn it off mid song in favor of Bob Marley? Bore me (yawn).

I've been hearing Whitney's new single, "Million Dollar Bill," on Argentine radio. Does that mean her comeback translates?

When did Halloween become more about costume parties than trying to scare the hell out of everyone? Last year a friend of mine here in BA dressed as a mummy, which has got to be the most creative costume I've heard of since my college friend Mo (short for Maureen) dressed as Moses.

When did just about everyone I know start popping tranquilizers and sleep aids just to get through the day -- and night? Lily Allen is right: Everyone's at it (including me)!

Who says Americans have bad taste? This week, John Mayer's great new single, "Who Says," debuts on Billboard's Hot 100 at No. 17, immediately making it a higher-charting hit (by one notch) than his probable signature, "Your Body Is A Wonderland." Am I the only one who finds it hard to believe that he has yet to score a Top 10 single? In other Billboard news, Lady Gaga, the Black Eyed Peas and Beyonce (one notch away from her fourth Top 10 from I Am... Sasha Fierce) continue their quest for total chart domination. Interestingly, after four weeks, Alicia Keys's new one, "Doesn't Mean Anything," is still struggling in the sixties. I'll bet a million dollar bill that she won't be adding to her No. 1 tally with this one. Do you agree?
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